Dark Cloud

I'm sure we can all feel it; my family, I mean. This feeling of despair has slowly crept up into us like some sort of contemptuous vine. Now, a dark cloud hangs over each of us, carrying with it the same fear: that our best times are behind us and those feelings of happiness that we once had are gone forever. We keep looking outward for some sort of salvation. I don't think any of us feels it might be possible to will it to come from within. Perhaps time, or God's Grace, will change that...

The existential crisis I began having back in college never really went away. It just got pushed out of focus as I dedicated myself to my schoolwork and preparing for my career. I still hope that I will someday figure out how to bring meaning into my life; but for now a dark cloud, and despair, hinder that possibility.

I know I may sound horribly depressed considering the tone of this post, but the truth is I have been faced with several circumstances over the past year that I'm still not sure how to cope with. I usually rely on the support of my friends and family in times like these, however, they are all so far away right now and each dealing with their own set of problems.